Right Sized

I’ve been studying the Bible the last couple of days. I’ve been reading it for a while, but I was gratefully given a tool to help study and the tool has given me a lot of clarity about what is going on. I had a pretty good idea from general reading, but it was all messy in my brain.

Again, as a disclaimer, I am not preaching, I am just sharing what I have learned because it excites me and I hope it will help others along on their spiritual journey.

I learned how Jesus was tempted by Satan at some point. Jesus was tested three times and was able to rebuke Satan, and Jesus was right sized, beholding the power of God. Satan tried to sell the earth to Jesus, and Jesus repeatedly refers to Satan as the leader of this system of things, and of this earth. He was cast out of heaven and since has tried to manipulate us and the system for our destruction. During the studying, the tool referenced a scripture from Genesis, the story of the Tower of Babel. In this story a society of people had gathered to build a city and the tower. When God saw this he knew that it would be bad if people had such great power and this is when he separated our languages, so that we could not be powerful enough. This kept us right sized, humbled.

So if we were to look at a graph of some sort, we could see that we are not as powerful as God, but with are powerful with God behind us, and because of that we are more powerful than Satan. We need to remain right sized and humbled for the power of God to work through us. I think ego plays a part in this as well, if our ego is so big that we thank ourselves or are too self-absorbed to notice the other things around us then we are actually really small. This limits our power because we are human, we only use 10% of our brain supposedly, why limit yourself to 10% power? Why limit yourself to the flesh, that withers and dies? Surely if someone believes that they are so great and powerful why wouldn’t they want more? God gives us more if we believe in him and seek his knowledge. Then there are Satan’s puppets, people who do his bidding whether they know it or not. At some point they must have heard something, or felt their conscience battling before they sin… I know how it can become easier each time, you become enslaved. Anyway, it’s sad to know that anyone would believe that it’s okay to sin and to do whatever you please. God has promised that Satan is going to be destroyed and so will anyone who doesn’t believe in God or has sought him out. Why would anyone want to be destroyed?

So back to being right sized, the ego can get in the way. It keeps us from being humbled or it keeps us from believing that we deserve God. Everyone deserves God, but like the Jews, people can’t seem to have faith and give up their old ways, because it’s all they know, it seems to work for them and they are scared of change. I have many fears but they are all irrelevant, deep down I know that because today, in this moment, I am okay and I know that I have God and Jesus looking out for me because I seek, listen, and pray. I am not perfect but I know I am above Satan, despite being human and despite living in this system of things.


I’ve been thinking about faith a lot lately, because I know it is required in my life. I want to take control of things and people and it makes me miserable, then after the fact I realize I should have just had faith from the start. I know that giving my life and all it’s problems to God is easier said than done, but I feel that it is vital for me to be happier.

I read the book of Ruth in the Bible recently and I am amazed by the amount of faith that she had. I know that she had a choice to make like her sister-in-law, but could it have been divine intervention, or was it purely faith? If she had not gone with her mother-in-law then God would have to find another way for King David to be born. Ruth had faith and loyalty and therefore she changed the world. It’s astounding really that if someone like us could just simply have faith and loyalty and trusted God that we could change the world.

I’m a little obsessed with how women throughout history have altered the course dramatically either through faith or falter. Ruth’s story is an oasis in the the Old Testament from blood, sin and damnation. Ann Boelyn is another story that fascinates me, she weaseled her way into the heart of Henry VIII, and basically caused the reformation. Ultimately she was beheaded as her father watched, but she changed the world, it’s pretty heavy.

There are a couple more modern day examples that escape me right now, but back to the Bible; Elizabeth, the mother of John the Baptist and Mary, the mother of Jesus had enormous faith, and I’m sure it helped that they were visited by angels, but still, if someone claims to have been visited by angels today, they might be considered a little loco. (Unless they see Mary on a piece of toast, then it’s totally cool.) Two women who weren’t supposed to have babies, had babies. Divine intervention is real, I’ve experienced it, but it’s kind of morose and I won’t discuss it unless I’m asked.

Of course these stories of faith that I have mentioned and how certain acts have steered history are great examples of how faith can work. My life is not so grand, I’m one among millions of other stars and I will quote, “…what is an ocean, but a multitude of drops.” It’s from the movie Cloud Atlas. I could alter the course of my life and those around me by trying to control the particular situation and getting a meager result, or I could let God work through me and get His result. Hmmm, His sounds better no matter what. How do I let go? If I’m just thinking about the situation I can let my mind squish, stretch and bend over it for a little while before reminding myself that I need to just have faith. If I’m taking action but obsessing over the result I am not having faith, but if I take action knowing that God will provide me the best result for everyone involved, that is faith. Faith without works is dead, so it is important to take action, but trying to control the results, obsessing over the results, or having expectations over the results is not having faith.

This can apply to any situation large or small, light or heavy, birth to death. Of course, I’m not preaching, I’m reminding myself as I type that this is what I need to work on. I feel like I don’t have much faith lately, I worry a lot, and of course worrying is praying for the bad thing to happen. I need to purge myself of the negativity and not be so damn disappointed and scared all the time. I hope that this helps someone else and that no matter where you are in life or whatever situations you may be dealing with at the moment, give it to God and rest easy that you have met Him half way.